There’s someone who seems to have been avoiding me for months now, and I suspect it has something to do with the way we clashed during my major depressive episode last spring. But I wasn’t sure, and didn’t want to make things worse by asking about it — and every time I tried to write to her about it, it just didn’t sound right, didn’t seem the right way to go about it.
I finally sent a short and to the point message yesterday: basically, it seems there might be an unresolved issue, and if yes, can we try to resolve it, and if no, fine.
I got a response this morning, that yes, there are unresolved issues.
I am glad that I finally spoke up — I think it was the right thing to do. I am not surprised by the response I got, and glad I got it.
But oy — conflict is painful, and to a ruminant like me it can color everything during the resolution process, so that it is hard to let it go in the moments we’re not actually talking / writing to each other. My stomach is all knotted already.
All that to say, I would appreciate prayers for the two of us, that we would be able to speak / write clearly and honestly, and to hear / listen / read openly, with resolution in mind and not quick to anger or taking offense.
That’s not to say we should stifle our feelings if we do feel offended or angry, but that we would be able to work through it appropriately.
It’s been eighteen days and no response. I guess that’s not a long time, but it feels like it. I begin to wonder if the resolution will actually progress. — April 1