Guess what?

1. I’m going to be on tv tomorrow. Local (South Bend) station, WSBT, playing and talking about hammered dulcimer, as part of a feature on the Yellow River Festival. I’m not sure what time yet, but it should be somewhere between 7 and 8:30 in the morning. If you don’t live here or miss it, you might be able to catch it on their website — they have some stories available as video on demand.

I am very nervous. Talk about short notice. I have to decide what to wear. What to play if I get a chance to play something. Consider what they might ask, what I might say. I hope I don’t say anything to embarrass the festival people.

2. Weeks and weeks after I backed out of the garage too close to the side and broke the side mirror off, it is now fixed. Amy and I sat around in and out of the body shop office while they put the new mirror on, and we got to meet a baby and two little kids stopping by their daddy’s work on their way to the grocery store.

3. After the body shop, we went to Wal-mart to buy some toddler underwear. I was hoping to find some thicker underwear, training pants, but they didn’t have any. I hemmed and hawed and then decided to buy regular underwear and see what happens. A few of my friends have mentioned going straight from diapers to underwear, so there’s precedent.

Amy was very excited to buy the underwear, hold the packages all the way home, and practice trying to put them on and take them off. We talked a lot about not peeing in underwear, but taking it off and using the potty.

She has had two dry diapers this morning (and I think those are the only diapers she’s worn between waking up and napping) and has peed in the potty three times.

4. I’m tired of 33×365. I’m going to take a little (or long) break.

Social day, and diaper magic

It’s Wednesday. I think both playgroups are permanently dissolved, but one woman has been sending emails about meeting at the park on Wednesdays. Last week it was just her and me. I don’t know if the other ladies will reappear or not. For sanity’s sake I am assuming not, and then if it happens that will be nice.

Today was looking wet, but I still thought it would be a good idea to go out. I had called the coffeehouse yesterday (looking for my $100 weekly gig, haha). I’d given them one of my CDs in March or something, and called once in a while trying to get in touch with the owner, who hasn’t called back. So I decided to go there — have some tea and a scone and see if I could talk with the owner in person.

I picked up Melissa and baby Noah along the way. We sat in the back on the comfy couch, chatting, munching, watching Amy play, looking at Noah.

I did talk to the owner. She did like the CD. She would like me to play — perhaps just once, but maybe it’ll turn into more than that. And she apologized about only being able to offer $100 for two hours, but I was secretly thrilled. She says she will call to arrange a Friday evening or Saturday morning.

Just before I’d left the house, my friend Amy G (with the struggling baby Molly) called to invite me over, which was very sweet. We agreed I’d come after the coffeehouse, for lunch. And we did.

I changed Amy’s diaper right when we arrived. I’d put her in a diaper cover this morning, so I didn’t have a snappi with me (you can put a diaper and cover on together so that no snappi is needed), but I also didn’t have a second diaper cover — just some wool pants. So I managed to fold up the diaper and, with oldest boy’s help, get the wool pants on over it.

Several minutes later I saw Amy playing with a clean diaper. I momentarily wondered how she got up on the table and got it out of her diaper bag without me noticing, but didn’t really think much of it, and just put the diaper away.

During lunch, Amy rather suddenly wanted to get down. I told her she could wait patiently and sit with us while we finished eating. Then she said she’d peed, and seemed distressed.

Turns out, she’d managed to pull that diaper off her bottom, from underneath the wool pants, without disturbing them. So all through that time she was just naked under those wool pants.

Oh my.

We cleaned up, put a new diaper on (with the diaper cover), took a stroller walk, then it was time to come home and get ready for a nap.

I am still yawning a lot, but not as bad as yesterday.

Protected: More teeth, more tired

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Recent cute Amy things

Running around the campfire circle at the academy, yelling excitedly, “cement!”

Playing “diaper change” with her stuffed Minnie Mouse.

Playing “take a nap” — role playing herself, and also putting her little dolls to bed.

Delightedly accepting a napkin to wipe her own face and hands and a spill and her cup and the table.

Climbing on some playground equipment for the first time, and, with help, going down the slide.

———

Yes, I am aware of the irony in the juxtaposition of this and the next post.

Various

1. At Lowe’s the other day, going from the car to the entrance, Amy yells out, “Oh my goodness! Look at all lawnmowers!“

2. Greenness… is only a little thing, even though the possibilities and responsibilities seem so overwhelming and endless. What am I doing for the poor? Or for anyone else?

3. Sometimes, begrudging love is the only love there is. It’s unrealistic to expect people to never be annoyed or concerned about costs or whatever. Or to never find my quirks irksome or my flaws severe. A task I have been working on for years now — being able to receive begrudging love, the love that, however reluctantly, agrees to do what I am asking even though annoyance or concern or whatever is also in the picture, or agrees to be my friend despite irksomeness. Besides, isn’t my love for others almost always begrudging?

4. God’s love is never begrudging.

5. Amy walked on tiptoe at church this morning. She also likes to try on other people’s shoes and try to walk in them.

6. My paper journal entries, from late November (when I started this particular journal) until yesterday, are almost exclusively about being depressed and / or anxious and / or angry. Perhaps it’s just skewed, since the positive things end up here on the blog more often than in the private journal.

7. I am contemplating how I might respond. I could do a few months’ charts — chart my daily moods, chart what I eat, the weather, whether I exercise, etc. I could commit to work — to prescribe myself exercise, good eating, DBT skills practice, prayer, gratitude lists, etc. I could call Joe and / or my psychiatrist and talk about talking about maybe considering Zoloft again — but I said I would wait a year before making that decision.

8. I waver between feeling the need to take more responsibility for myself, take more action, and the feeling that I am already overburdened with work and death, tired of bearing all the responsibility for myself.

9. Amy can drink from a cup now.

10. The relationships in Christianity among work, death, grace, and life, are intriguing, confusing, interesting, promising.

11. (This one goes to eleven!) Baby Molly is home from the hospital. The trouble was with her epiglottis — she was aspirating the formula. Now she eats as much rice-thickened formula as she will take from a bottle, followed by high-calorie formula through her tube. She has good color and is nicely chubby.

#163: Miss Sava

My first grade teacher. Grey. Little. Even though you put me in the corner, not seeing the boy who instigated, I liked you. Do first grade kids still sit at desks in rows?

18 month well visit

Amy went to see Dr. Miller today.

She is 32 inches high, weighs 25.6 pounds, and has a head circumference of 18 1/2 inches. She looks good otherwise, too.

She is “ahead” in her verbal abilities, but “behind” in that she doesn’t run yet and is just starting to be a successful climber. No one is worried.

Some people wanted me to ask about shoes. Again, Dr. Miller is not worried. There is no “have to” age about the kind of shoes you wear — the soft soles are fine.

He’s impressed with her verbal skills (filling in the blanks when counting or doing the alphabet or reading or singing, lots of words, etc) and approves of our potty and discipline approaches. He says some parents of kids this age have some success with a timeout chair or place, but physical restraint works, too. The main thing is that it should be both unpleasant AND brief.

Amy was a little whimpery during the nurse’s and doctor’s examinations, which is only to be expected. The worst, of course, was the two shots. After a good cry she calmed down rather quickly.

Protected: This weekend in pictures

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Chia kitty

On Monday I started a Chia pet for Amy; got it through a white elephant gift exchange at Christmas. Soaked it and the seeds Sunday night, spread on the seeds Monday night, and here it’s sprouted already.

It looks pretty creepy to me. Like lots of little worms. Hmmm.

And it was good

The split pea soup, a double recipe, made five meals — the other four are in the freezer. I was a little concerned about it because it looked so thin, but it tasted great and the blender made a nice puree. And Mark remembered we had leftover ham in the freezer, so there was a little meat in the soup, too. (I know, I could have cut apart the hocks and gotten one or two tiny pieces, but, no thanks.)

The bread was also pretty good, although it was a little sour / yeasty to my taste. Maybe I let the second rise go too long, or maybe the recipe really was crazy to call for a tablespoon of yeast (I had to check twice to be sure that’s what it said).

On the other hand, the “pour boiling water in a pan on the lower rack” method is apparently not safe for use with a baking stone. It cracked. Loudly. Fortunately, only three pieces, and the bread was unharmed.

And here we are, still awake, because my dulcimer acquaintance in Chicago, who has no little children and works a non-teacher job, and who is in the next time zone, called us at 10:15 to discuss our carpooling plans for the Chattanooga festival; Mark was already asleep and I was almost there. Oh well.

May I mention that Amy can count to twelve? Sort of. If you say “1″ she says “2″ and so on, and sometimes she strings together several numbers all by herself, often in the right order. And when she’s looking at a book she sometimes repeats phrases or sentences she remembers from it.