On my own

Today there are no volunteers. This is the week of phasing them out — I just have a few people coming here and there for an hour or two.

My goals for today are:

• Do Amy’s laundry (check)
• Make bread to go with the soup Margaret made for us (check)
• Either do my Pilates video or take Amy for a walk in the sling (check)
• Eat lunch (a peanut butter sandwich, a banana, a carrot, and yogurt with raspberries) (check)
• Reschedule the pediatrician appointment because of our Indiana trip (check)
• Be kind and patient with myself and with Amy, taking timeouts as necessary (check)

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Edited to add:

It’s now 2:45. Amy has been asleep since about 12:30 and will likely wake up soon. Meanwhile here’s what’s happened so far:

While she was still asleep I put on a dulcimer CD, had my morning online time, then moved things around in the living room so I’d have enough space to exercise. I also called the pediatrician and rescheduled Amy’s appointment.

She woke around 10:30. Changed and fed. I put her in the sling to carry her into the kitchen to prepare her bottle, and put her in it again after feeding — we walked around (inside) a bit, took pictures, and went downstairs to put her laundry in the dryer.

Back upstairs, we both had gym time: she lay on her playmat while I did most of my Pilates video, although she seemed more interested in watching my movements than batting at her toys. She started getting sleepy; fell asleep on the playmat but kept hitting the arch when those arms would flail, so I tried to move her onto a quilt, but being moved woke her up. We tried the swing next, and that’s where she’s been since.

This half-dozing trying to get to sleep thing has been the most tense part of the day so far, and it wasn’t that bad.

While she slept I put the ingredients in the bread machine, made and ate lunch (except the yogurt; maybe later), sat with the kitty and a book, folded the laundry, put out a book, a toy, a blanket, and my recorder on the bed for Amy’s next awake time, formed and baked the rolls, edited and posted the sling pictures, and here I am just waiting for her to wake up.

It’s already 3:00; only an hour and a half until Mark gets home, and all my goals are accomplished.

What, are the pills suddenly working? I don’t even remember if I took a morning Ativan or not.

I dare not expect too positive a late afternoon and evening after such a nice day so far… I dare not expect anything positive in general. Lord, I believe; help my unbelief.